Thursday, November 12, 2009

Who Woulda Thunk

Big Guy and I are off to Asia, and I knot that he's really looking forward to the job interview he'll be having with our future Chinese overlords.

We'll be taking off from Alaska shortly, and I couldn't help but pass along this little nugget for you folks to mull over:

Big Guy looked out the window of Air Force One as it was refueling here a few minutes ago and discovered that you can see Russia from here.


  1. Yeah? That's nothing. We can feel Russia here in the lower 48! Not sure how many can still see America from their house. I know Tina Fey sees Russia from hers.

  2. With a side trip to meet with the thugs from Burma, uh I mean, Myanmar (sorry lost my head there for a sec.) It's always more fun to meet with folks you have much in common with.

    TOTUS - take a tip from Sarah - GO ROGUE!

  3. TOTUS, your "boss" should follow your example and admit when he's wrong.

    Wait.... Like THAT will ever happen! Messiahs are never wrong!

    When Sarah Palin's book comes out on Nov. 18th, BO will be MORE worried about her than he is NOW! You betcha!

    (Code and Dorothy, your posts are hilarious!)

  4. Good Morning TOTUS!
    How exciting! Remember to take notes, especially of more specialized socialist lingo - like calling our troops "comrades" at Fort Hood. That's kind of Russiany sounding, don't you think? When the Chinese take over, they are going to need us to know familiar phrases that will help them feel at home.

    I hope you've got more great, inspiring, even god-like speeches in your hard drive for Big Guy. I realize that the communists don't believe in God, but God and god are not the same thing at all, and BG is going to have to impress them a lot to get them to believe in him, and all that hopey changey thing. I hope you took enough ACORN missionaries with you, there's a lot of peeps in China! Oh hell, hopefully you took all of them. What with the new commie/capitalist economy, there's probably plenty looking out to skip taxes. Only, in China you pay with your skull.

    Just you watch out for your screens, stream plenty of ass kissing rhetoric, and whatever you do - do not mention Tibet!!

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  6. TOTUS, remind Big Guy that he can actually see the Soviet Union (Capitol Hill) and China (Treasury) from the White House.

  7. Good one.

    I wonder if he noticed that he can see Mexico from Albuquerque. Oh wait - he didn't get a bee up his behind about illegals yet. That's next years agenda.

  8. I think this is the big one we've all been waiting for people! It's official. OBAMA'S KENYAN BIRTH CERTIFICATE HAS BEEN LOCATED!!!!

    Wowie Zowie!!! I can't wait to see what happens next! Does anyone think Obama will resign now that this bomb has been dropped? Praise the Lord for finally revealing the truth about this Muslim, Communist Traitor!

  9. bettyann...I can actually see Mexico from my house, too. My neighbor is getting a new roof...

  10. Does anyone know why the MSM hasn't reported anything about Obama's Kenyan Birth Certificate? I haven't heard anything about it from Rush or Fox news either.

  11. And if it falls off the roof, it is fully covered medically. And the ACLU sues the neighbor on behalf of the entire Republic of Mexico, for lost wages. Wages in America being Mexico's entire GNP, you understand.

  12. hotsonoguy -- if you notice, the article was dated last August -- I think Taitz's suit has already been filed and dismissed (Oct. 29), the court deciding it had no jurisdiction to hear the case, as only Congress can remove a sitting president. Maybe in 2010??

  13. TOTUS, you said that the Kenyan birth certificate was sent to the moon when we attacked the lunar surface a few weeks ago!

  14. He can't recognize a terrorist. Why would we expect him to recognize Russia? Hopefully he's brought plenty of coloring books for his trip.

  15. TOO FUNNY, FOTs!
    Yes, it's creepy all right, "We the People," that we owe so much money to China----and have so many commies in BO's administration. ACK!

    Yeah, bettyann----BO has delayed "indefinitely" any discussion re. illegal aliens. China's pseudo-capitalist economy "works" because they use the dheap (ie. FREE) labor of imprisoned dissidents, who produce goods in the prison factories.
    How is your book and your motorcycling for the troops coming along?

    So sorry, hotsonoguy, that the case re. BO's birth cert. was dismissed. You know what? If they COULD prove he was Kenyan-born and thus didn't comply with the Constitution, this Dem Congress would simply CHANGE the Constitution, and while they're at it, let him stay on for more than 2 terms: ack! They don't like the Constitution....

    Thanks for this information about the birth cert., aero. Any word yet about a FOTs package for the troops with your brother? I sure hope they get to have SOME fun. We are always, daily grateful for their service. How's your job search going, too?

    Neaglu, I forgot all about our having attacked the moon! Yep, that's where TOTUS thinks BO sent his "real" birth cert.; he's got it right where he wants it: gone!

    Writer X, your post is a scream! BO does indeed fail to recognize terrorism----and he is NOT brainy, as his persona tries to fake.

    Well, last night on Fox News, most pundits said they didn't think Obamacare had a chance of passing the Senate. I wonder if that's just Republicans' whistling in the dark? (But I hope they're instead correct!)

    TWW, I hope your husband is feeling much better every day.

    Have a nice evening, FOTs.

  16. Cerro will be in bookstores everywhere. There will be a movie out in two years.

    By then Obama will get half of what I earn, and did they lift a finger to help write it? How about feed my kids while I worked for minimum wage and wrote it? As they did not come around with an extra tit, I resent every penny they take above 20%, which is very generous at that rate.

    Buck Farack

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  18. Great news about the upcoming movie, bettyann. I hope it will help promote all your other writing and help the family's finances!

    But 20% taxes is FAR too much!
    Read about the wonderful Automated Payment Transaction Tax, which is verifible statistically. It saves EVERYONE money----rich or poor, business or people.

    THe APT Tax is only 3 cents per $10 transaction (whenever we make purchases, get paid, deposit, or withdraw money from an account).

    Think! Only $300 tax/year for a family with a gross income of $50,000/year----TOTAL federal and state tax!

    Why will no politician help enact this low, fair tax? Because politicians derive power from holding the tax code over Americans' heads!

    If only the public learned that the APT Tax would work! THINK how much more of our OWN money we could have, to spend as we wish.

  19. Now, that was stra-ange...! I posted a comment that showed it had posted just fine, but then it disappeared! I left the 'Net, returned, and tried to find it posted again. Nope: it wasn't there!
    So I posted another one like the first, as best I could remember. Well, when THAT posted (it's still above), then BOTH of them suddenly posted! ACK!
    So then I deleted the first one.
    Is this a common thing? I've never had that happen before.

  20. OH! I forgot to mention that the APT Tax is all that is needed to cover the costs of EVERY federal and state program. THAT is why it's awful that the politicians would enact it....

  21. (*groan*)

    "THAT is why it's awful that the politicians will NOT enact it."

  22. Even the President noted that Pvt Francheska Velez was expecting a baby.

    Adding my voice 13 Charges of murder should be 14 charges of Murder. Who is going to speak up for Baby Velez? 12 Soldiers 1 civilian and one unborn baby. That’s 14 counts.

  23. If they enacted APT, how would they use class envy to promote their agenda?

    It's wishful thinking about a movie, but you never know. This is still America, where anything can happen, and as Americans we dream big, over the top, because that's the way we are made. Besides, somebody's got to make it. I figure, why not? If not, I still live int he best country on the planet, and I'll teach my kids to dream big, and reach for stars.

  24. Keyboard, I thought that too. Even if they don't make it official, the count of murdered Americans that day stands at 14. We know it, and that baby's family knows it.

  25. I would think that Texas would surely be one of the states where the killing of an unborn child, EXCEPT by its abortion-seeking mother, is still legally called, "murder." After all, even in liberal Iowa, that's so: women who drive drunk, get in car accidents, and kill unborn children are charged with murder (even when the mother survives, see?).

    But I would NOT put it past this d--d Obot admnistration to put the screws onto the Texas officials, NOT letting them charge this "poor Muslim" (RALPH!) with that 14th murder----even if their law WOULD do so otherwise. I hope what's HONEST happens.

  26. I believed you, bettyann, that your book was going to be made into a movie and marketed everywhere, because I've known people who became famous just that way (Scott Adams, Frank Peretti). Keep hoping; it could happen!

  27. Here's an idea, either stay home and do your job or stay out of the country and leave us the hell alone. Frankly, I am tired to death of this guy traveling overseas to badmouth us while simultaneously expecting us to bankroll his new society. I want out.

  28. bettyann, I'm hoping for a mini-series, or a weekly show about Cerro. I can imagine the many (miss)adventures of Delbert and all of his friends and neighbors (Harley, Earl, Vance, Billy, etc) and even Mr. Schnitzel!

    I want to change the subject for a moment and share some news with you:

    === Recanvassing shows NY-23 race tightens even as Rep. Bill Owens is sworn into House seat
    By Mark Weiner / The Post Standard (Syracuse)
    Washington -- Conservative Doug Hoffman conceded the race in the 23rd Congressional District last week after receiving two pieces of grim news for his campaign: He was down 5,335 votes with 93 percent of the vote counted on election night, and he had barely won his stronghold in Oswego County.

    As it turns out, neither was true. ===

    (I cut out a lot so you could get the gist of the story....)

    === a recanvassing in the 11-county district shows that Owens’ lead has narrowed to 3,026 votes over Hoffman, 66,698 to 63,672, according to the latest unofficial results from the state Board of Elections.

    In Oswego County, where Hoffman was reported to lead by only 500 votes with 93 percent of the vote counted election night, inspectors found Hoffman actually won by 1,748 votes -- 12,748 to 11,000.

    The new vote totals mean the race will be decided by absentee ballots, of which about 10,200 were distributed, said John Conklin, communications director for the state Board of Elections. ===

    and the best part of all.....

    === "We sent a letter to the clerk laying out the totals," Conklin said. "The key is that Hoffman conceded, which means the race is not contested. However, all ballots will be counted, and if the result changes, Owens will have to be removed." ===

  29. YYYYYYEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSS! Thanks, Jamie, so much for this GOOD NEWS about NY-23!

    Oh, I hope SO much that Hoffman has won!
    Any data about which party tends to use absentee ballots?

  30. Actually, that is the only story I saw today, but I didn't get much online time today. Had lots of stuff to do...

    But the article had this about the absentee ballots:

    === The new vote totals mean the race will be decided by absentee ballots, of which about 10,200 were distributed, said John Conklin, communications director for the state Board of Elections.

    Under a new law in New York that extended deadlines, military and overseas ballots received by this coming Monday (and postmarked by Nov. 2) will be counted. Standard absentee ballots had to be returned this past Monday. ===

    And this:

    === Jefferson County, home of Fort Drum and the Army's 10th Mountain Division, distributed 2,299 absentee ballots for the special election. As of this week, 1,303 had been returned but not counted, Eaton said. ===

    We may just have to wait and see what happens next week when they start counting the absentee ballots.

    Just goes to show - it ain't over, till it's over!

  31. So BHO stopped over in Alaska. I guess he wanted to make sure he could say he had visited all 57 states. I wonder if he tried to speak "Alaskan" while he was there .....

  32. Did BO meet any Alaskans at a rally there? If so, probably he's trying to beef up the opposition to Republicans, especially Palin's successor.

    Or to see Levi and set up the next sequence of, you know....

  33. WAIT! Seriously, I just remembered:
    Republicans in several states are worried that the high ratio of absentee ballots will reflect ACORN's work.

  34. Mountain Mama,

    I'm sure you're joking about Congress, because obviously they can't change the constitution. That said, I have to imagine that Obama's Marxist sympathizers somehow got to that judge. I'm not sure if they paid him off, or threatened him somehow, but I can't imagine any legitimate reason why a judge would throw out a case like that!

    Won't anyone have the courage to reveal the truth about this evil man?!?

  35. MM:
    I believed me, too.

    "...have the courage..."

    Ya; us FOTae. Encouraged by TOTUS, we revel in the Messiah's discouragement.

    However, thus far he has only become more lizard-like, engulfing great mounds of kobi (calves penned and massaged and even hung on hammocks to keep them from using muscles) beef, which is as we all realize from watching B alien movies the staple of the reptilian: a trapped mammal.

    An heartless creature, the reptile, without an hypothalmus, nor any stimulation between right and left lobe, nor any paternal or maternal instinct.

    He is, in effect, as cool as a gila monster. As collected as a dragon. And as ugly as a Tyranasaurus Rex. Which is very goddamn ugly. Worse, it cannot see you unless you move first. Therefore it is a "reactor" - not a leader. Far from a leader.

    ...At this juncture I believe that Preptile might enter, and add bit of inside info on the insidious inheritor of the insect's domain, the prep-tile, a creature of the opportune. Take it away, Preptile............

  36. Oops, hotsonoguy! I meant that Congress would AMEND the Constitution, which can be done. That, Congress will try to do, to remove the 2-term limit, and natural-born citizen requirement, for the presidency.

    Hopefully, though, Congress won't be able to reach the required 2/3 majority of both House and Senate, in order to pass such amendments. Yet the MSM and Dems are committed to helping BO be a "successful" president, so I believe this is what they'll try hard to accomplish. Arms will be broken; heads will roll; deals will be made that don't necessarily help Americans, and which cost TONS!

  37. :D LOLOLOLOL Re-cap...... ](C:}

    [Note: There were lots of other very funny lines above not quoted below, wanted to keep list fairly short.]

    [Code] "Not sure how many can still see America from their house. I know Tina Fey sees Russia from hers."

    [We] "I can actually see Mexico from my house, too. My neighbor is getting a new roof..."

    [Jamie] "... he wanted to make sure he could say he had visited all 57 states. I wonder if he tried to speak "Alaskan" while he was there .....


    Witty piece there, BettyAnn. Nice!

    Yeah, you lobbed the Prepster a great opening to slam home another set of bright lines. I think this is one of the nights Mr. P. teaches tennis. After dealing with all those limp wrists and faulting students, he probably just feels like going, "Aaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrgh!" When he gets home.

    ----hey.......... Did you hear something? ........Yes, I'm sure that's what it is. The slightly muffled but unmistakable sound of Mr. P.. (:o)]

    MM, thank you, my husband is doing well. We're out of the woods, now.

  38. If the FOTS were a basketball team.........

    TV sports commentator/announcer Rush Limbaugh:

    Welcome back, ladies and gentlemen. It's half-time here at the TOTUS Pavilion -- FOTS up by 92 over the Chicago Thugs who managed to score just one point from Pelosi's foul shot. Now, before I discuss highlights from the first half, I'm going to talk about me...... uh.... what's that, Snerdley?......I've already talked too much about me?... Impossible! Let me tell you about the time I was eating dinner and smoking cigars with some ............what's that?...... time for the Official Obama Criticizer [certified black enough to comment]? Oh. Okay.

    Bo Snerdly: This is Bo Snerdly, official Obama criticizer with real slave blood, black enough to speak my mind. [Honkey talk part omitted] Hey, yo! Obamma-michelle's-my-mama! You needs yo mama, yo? Ya'll needs yo buhraaane turned ON. Wha'ssup, yo? Can't ID a Muhammedhead EVEN THOUGH he be ANNOUNCIN' "Allahoooo, aaackbar?" You had anotheruh those joint sessions up there, yo? Get your head in the GAME, oreo. Them ragheads got 14 an' USn's got ZERO. Time to even thee score, man.

    An' stop dissin' America, yo. Even them punks from de hood what held up a soldier, they got more brain cells lit up than yo! Aww, fuhgeddaboudit. Yo's an EMBARRASSMENT, yo! You ain't no homey, yo's a homO, D'oh!

    Do the black community a favor (for once) -- you be "the Magic Negro" -- do a trick. Do that transparent thing and become INVISIBLE. .... This has been a public service announcement from Bo Snerdly, Official Obama Criticizer.

    Rush: Thank you, Mr. Snerdly. [uses 40 second delay to say: Oh, great. Here comes one of those "Info Babes." Who invited her up here? Women belong in the kitchen. -- audio cut by producer]

    FOT Team Owner, Jamie: Hello, Rush.

    Rush [coolly polite]: Hello, Jamie. Learn anything in the locker room...... Now, come on, folks!...... I meant in her INTERVIEWS with the players, heh, heh.

    Jamie [always the professional, ignores him]: Yes, I have some interesting information to report. FOT team accountant, John (of the Space) announced the good news that all the FOTS would get their hiring bonus this year, but the shouts of joy were quickly silenced when he soberly stated that those bonuses would be paid in 2011 dollars, making them worth about sixty cents.

    Rush: That's change for ya.

    Jamie: I also got to talk to Thug head coach, Toes....

    [video played of the gorgeous and, TASTEFULLY dressed, Jamie holding microphone in Rahm's face....]

    Jamie: Your team is doing a lot of running all over the place. How do you plan to get some points on the board?....

    Rahm: Weehhhl, by, uh, chea-- er ... making more use of our inside guys.....

    Jamie: Ayers? Daschle? Surely, not Giggly ......

    Rahm: Nooo.... that would be Ali Muhammed, Muhammed Hussein, Malike Hasan ... aaan.... well you get the picture......

    Jamie: Uh, huh. And, how about that famous "Crisis" play? Will we see any of that in the second half?......

    Rahm [sneers]: We'll just have to wait and see what happens.....


  39. Rush: Wow, Jamie. Sobering stuff from the "punch drunk" "gallows humor" gang. Okay, I see the teams are coming back out onto the floor. There's Assistant Coach Shovel Ready, [chuckles] and, would you look at that, he's giving the team one of his famous pep talks.

    Jamie [smiles]: I can hear him now, "There is no 'i' in 'team,' FOTS! There are, however 2 'i's' in 'idiot.' Work together! Pass the ball around. We'll get the job done."

    Rush: Let's go down to our Pundit on the floor, Bob Preptile. Hey, Bob.

    Bob (Prep): Hey, Rush. Enjoyed that golf game with you last week.

    Rush: Sure you did, Prepster; you beat the pants off me. Lightened my wallet for me, too. Say, Bob, get that mike behind the FOT bench, let's hear what's happening down there.

    [video of team milling about, some sitting down, waiting for the half-time show to end -- audio-over of:]

    CouchPotato (#77) [sitting, of course]: Hey, MTVA, where's that BossyNurseMom? Coach has left me on the bench so long, I've got a sprained bum.

    MTVA: Sorry about that, Couch. The Coach Shovel's brother-in-law is ill, he's distracted; I think he's just going with his regulars. Try standing up and yelling -- maybe he'll notice you.....

    Couch: Maybe. Say, you going back to Virginia for Thanksgiving?

    MTVA: Sigh. No. But, someday..... Someday, I will invite you to MY place in VA.

    BettyAnn: Couch! MTVA! What's with all the yacking? Look alive and help me get these DVD's of "Cerro: the Movie" [IT HAPPENED! IT HAPPENED! :D] out of the box so I can sign them for the Special Olympics kids.

    MRS: Special Olympics kids? Where are they?

    [The Chicago Thugs, meanwhile, are punching each other, esp. Giggly, in the nose, stabbing each other in the back, cursing, and yelling stuff like, "That's above my pay grade!"]

    Rattler: They're the ones out there doing the Haarlem Globetrotters-style ball manuevers for the half-time show. The ball handling Peach Obama couldn't even come close to. [Bawney Fwank of the Thugs blunders through the FOTS on his way to the bathroom, stepping on Rattler's foot] HEY! DON'T TREAD ON ME, YOU WEANIE.

    [FOT team press release maven, Writer X, interrupts briefly: How's "FOTS Thump Thugs" for a headline? Gotta go.]

    MRS: Aaaand, she's gone. Man, she sure is short.

    Chris: A regular Munchkin --

    MM: -- Bless her heart --

    Chris: -- but witty.

    Dorothy: I love Munchkins! They helped me get started.

    ArmchairGeneral: Brief is good. Get to work! [rapidly grabs basketballs from bin at his side, rifling them at Couch, MTVA, and MRS]

    [Team Owner TOTUS having not provided enough direction, some of the FOTs start to argue amongst themselves over what plays they're supposed to run (Asst. Coach Shovel called away for awhile)]

    Head Coach Janice [laughing gently]: Come now, FOTS, we'll just take turns and run the same plays we used at turnout yesterday. We can make this work....

    Bob Preptile: As a certain guilty King declared, "...just get along," you harridans!

    TWW: Harridans?!? Why you --

    Rush: Aaaaaand that's all for now, folks. We'll be back after these messages!

    [Advertisement begins with Rush doing audio: Try Zycam, folks. It doesn't help me (cough, cough), but it might help you. [cough, cough] Aw, heck. Forget the Zycam and just get a Sleep Number bed and sleep it off. Yeah..... sleep it off knowing Carbonite is protecting all of your personal stuff. Eat.... what's the name of that meat I eat all the time again? --- well, just eat it. And join the Heritage Foundation and smoke cigars and don't exercise to lose weight and I hate fruit!]

  40. TOTUS, I'd like your comment on this:

    Who is this guy?

    While I appreciate your patriotic attitude, I really do wish that the Big One would also salute the flag. Any chance you can teach him?

  41. "...I really do wish that the Big One would also salute the flag..."

    Henrik, that would be spelled, "The Big WON".

  42. His flag has the crescent moon and star on it.

    This putrifide pile of excrement has broken all his promises that would help American and Americans; he's now determined to keep promises that will destroy, ruin, and/or enslave Americans (ie, TARP, DeathCare, all his Anti-American appointments, delays on Afghanistan, and now he's bringing that murdering Islamic terrorist from Gitmo to NYC to stand CIVIL Trial!!!! Not a military trial for WAR crimes, but civilian!!!! He's not an AMerican! He has NO RIGHTS!)

    And BO will tell the idiotic Lib Judge to throw the case out due to: 1) The terrorist wasn't read his rights at time of capture, 2) His admission of guilt was gained from 'torture', & 3) illegally detaining him, and anything the traitors can come up with.

    This is insane!

    I say get a Louisville Slugger baseball bat, smash his ribs in three times, take him to the Empire State building and douse him with jet fuel, set him fire, then throw him off. Too bad it can only be done once.

    Then take all the traitors from the WH and Congress and charge them with treason for aiding and abetting the enemy -- that's why the bastard won't use certain terms; that way, with no enemy, he can't be charged.

    may he burn in Hell.

  43. Wow, MRS.

    We could do it twice if we used a bunji cord, and waited at the top with extinguishers. Once is not enough : it's the spirit of the thing that matters most.

  44. Good thinking bettyann!

    my ver word is patio

    I would like to sit out on the patio and watch that, while I sip some sweet iced tea. Sounds like great entertainment.

  45. gotta keep the bungee cord from burning, since we can't use asbestos anymore.

  46. Having spilled more than most have drunk I have forgotten most of the anatomy I knew way back when,Hens.
    However,I seem to recall a Reptilian brain stem at the center of all of our cerebral cortae ,(or core Texas,as some say_PProudly).
    Theoretically,we acquired levels of sophistication as tissue was added on and layered over,over eons of evolving.

    Some will correctly note that the above
    snake / shrink never did much of that.
    There may be something to that theory.

    Our actions are driven by pheromones and instincts deeper than logic.
    Sex drives and fight or flite impulses,remembering how to drink or swallow food,these are survival basics protected by the I-beam that is the spine as it terminates at the skull.(If only it were blue steel like a certain Teleprompter).In this construction the desire to have sex and procreate is protected by all the armour the body offers.One suspects this very basic instinct and biological imperative drives jihadis toward perverting those promised virgins ,even in death.A praying mantis makes the same fatal mistake that this praying man does.
    Yes,the reptile brain is to blame for his suicidal behavior,and all for sex.
    Dreadful mistakes are made when allowing that snake to drive one's decision making process.Should the predator pursue mammals,or merely mammaries the reptile rules rule.
    My personal annaconda has,at last call ,made dreadful decisions.
    Obviously one cannot as always blame the bossa nova.Blame nature instead.
    The most basic (P)reptilian variety.

    OT,to clarify my last post,chicken feed,if used correctly,has but one destiny.

    Persons were perplexed by prior parody postulating it's Presbyterian pre-destination.My paragraph performed poorly.
    Well pshaw pained parishoners,one proposed, poo.Poultry poo.
    Pardon that paragraph.
    Peevishly it is always the peeing keeping me up at night.
    Perhaps (reptile) roosters propose or proposition to do they same to you.
    You are advised to advise them that they should cock a doodle do that elsewhere.

    Back to that chicken shit.
    We had stepped in some during the catfight at the henhouse,but seem to have survived.Players and prayers alike should thank their lucky stars about that.I have.
    OT2 ,TWW I also enjoyed that boy from Indonesia tune and think it should be saved for a greatest hits tab here on the front page.Teleprompter,like Milton Bearle has that legendary enormous hard drive that could potentially please a few patrons.
    I have seen a few sentences here worth saving.
    Perhaps the promptczar will ponder our pleas.
    It would be particularly pleasing.

    Peas out Pardners,and happy trails too.

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