Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Misreading Between the Lines

Big Guy was having a particularly leisurely breakfast this morning here in paradise, when he kind of coughed up his fresh papaya juice.  He was reading the daily news summary that Gibbsy and his team pull together for him.  "The [damn] media," Big Guy said. "I can't believe they'd allow something like this to be published."

Toes asked what it was. Big Guy said, "Slate claims, and I quote, 'civilians ... are under a relentless and planned assault from the pledged supporters of a wicked theocratic ideology.' That's a little unfair calling our administration and our supporters something like that. I mean, they can be a little over the top with their love for me, but really ... "

Toes leaned over and read the piece. "Sir, they're not talking about us. They're talking about al Qaeda."

Big O was kind of embarrassed for a couple of seconds, then just laughed it off, saying, "Man, I'm too stressed out. I need a vacation."


  1. Good idea. Let's get him on a rocket to Mars.

  2. TOTUS, you are on fire lately. Great posts!! And thanks!

  3. TOTUS, I, for one, am willing to see him on a permanent vacation for the next three years. I doubt Joey B. could do worse and would be a whole lot funnier.

  4. Oh, and PS, Thanks for keeping us updated.

  5. Nice post, TOTUS. You never cease to entertain and inform. :D

  6. TOTUS, Dear, is BG working out every morning at the Marine base in HI in order to beef-up so that he can protect us ALL BY HIS OWN SKINNY SELF from the man caused catastrophe makers?

  7. All this primping & preening at the make-up table called 'Health care Reform' has allowed Obama and the entire (Liberally-run) government to put America and all its citizens in grave danger. Yes, this guy 'failed' in his mission. But reports that 'others will follow' are chilling. If Obama is seen as a president who was more hell-bent on redistributing wealth and making unions happy than on keeping this country safe, he's toast. Actually, he may already be. Mrs. Butterworth in Homeland Security is utterly misplaced in her role. Obama wanted ultra-Liberals in his Cabinet...whether or not they could actually DO the jobs they were given.

  8. PPapaya juice you say ?
    Sometimes I think TP taunts me.
    If I may quote.."Big Guy was having a Particularly leisurely breakfast this morning here in Paradise, when he kind of coughed up his fresh Papaya juice".

    I am expecting Pineappple tomorrow.

    He might be amused to know that primarily due to him and this blog,I destroyed a certain key on my ex computer.Guess it suffered from low 'T' or something as that front edge just would not rise to a fully horizontal position.
    It was more,uh,(un)inclined as it pointed South towards the floorboards at every opportunity.
    Thought I coulda taught that computer a think or two about peeing,had I the ,uh,patience.
    I did not.

    As to that Presidential persecution......

    One understands how the One would think that.

    Republican theocrats populate his nightmares.

    Mine are more infested w the jihadi variety,but those are the neighborhood chums he grew up w,and is ,ahem,inclined to side w.

    For me,the Somali pirates,Ft Hoodlums and assorted jihadis (who shared an imam!),those assisting the ummah do little for me,or the country.
    On the contrary they do all they can to bring her down.
    Hope we never sink down to their level.
    Expert excavations are attempting to ascertain just how low they have gone.
    Speelunkers thought they had sighted the depths of their depravity,but then the next nursery school was bombed and they had to keep looking.
    Hope they don't hope to look in His Highnesse's Hawaiian volcanoes.
    We wouldn;t want his wacation wasted.
    The One only seeks solace thereabouts.

    Not having had a vacation in 20 years I envy
    his ability to take 20 in one,(and I encourage more).If reports from the Hopenchangen conference are to be believed (and locally they are not) the weather at the Poles should be too balmy for the bears.

    It could be the next Pristine Paradise prime for Presidential perusal and politically popular too!

    Please pardon the above Peas.
    I cannot help myself.

  9. Preptile. Perptually pardoned you are: please, do not prostate yourself, but pardon the peasantry's prediliction to pondered pondering. After all, it's just a post. 'Prompter simply proports pernicious and possibly personal notes of the presidential kind, for our perusal.

    Peas ouch.

  10. Peaing is pleasing and pardon requests much too prolific. And previous post cannot be paralleled.

    I would just address this to the BG who says this 'extremist' act was an isolated incident -Hola! Barry! The attack on Pearl Harbor was an ISOLATED INCIDENT! Comprennez-vous, Pardner?

  11. Poll Question: Should we pay for skin grafts for panty bomber?


  12. So when Big Guy finally came out and jawed a few words so it looked like he cared about the bombing attempt, did you hear him say something to the effect..."WE WILL NOT REST UNTIL..." the terrorist bombers are captured and tried? Then he proceeded right back to his vacation TO REST. And no one calls him on it. Not that I'm surprised.

    Of course, nothing this man says means a thing. Maybe this is what his administration means when they constantly bring up that annoying phrase of theirs... we need to have a "new conversation". Must be code for out and out ridiculousness. Or maybe it was just opposite day. Hard to tell.

    Totus, thanks for coming back to finish the year strong. You brought us through so many gut-wrenching days this year. It's good to see you out of hiding again. I am sure there are many times you feel the need to lay low. Gibbsy can get pretty testy and I'm sure with the commies and the maoists and the seiu thugs at every turn, it's hard to think straight some days.

    Plus it's hard to cover your back when you are personally responsible for Big Guy's transparency. So don't worry, I think besides the fact that he needs you just to form a coherent sentence, he needs you for the legality of being able to claim transparency in his administration as well. You are clearly all he's got on that front, and he can't risk letting anything happen to you.

    Keep your screen up and have a great new year!

  13. Quote of the Day: " ... it's hard to cover your back when you are personally responsible for Big Guy's transparency." Imageremix


    [Image] "we need to have a "new conversation".

    LOL. Translation: We need to have another planning committee meeting, that is, ........................... we're clueless.

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