Tuesday, September 8, 2009

The Speech Big Guy Was Going to Make ...

People have been asking about the "original" school address for this morning. Well, Big Guy didn't get too far with it, but this about all I had loaded into my hard drive as of last Monday.

Good morning.

Today I am going to speak to you about me. Well, not entirely about me; I will speak to you about you, too, but mostly I’m going to talk about me and how you can be like me. Because I have had a great deal of experience in school. In education. In learning. In teaching. In learning to teach.

Many years ago, as a young, multi-racial youth living on foreign soil, I had fears starting in my new elementary school. This may surprise you, but I was a goofy looking kid, with big ears and a big mouth that could just run, and run and run. But I had hope on that first day in Hawaii. And I had desire. Loads of desire. And I embraced that load and transformed it into something good, and positive. It was called the intent to achieve. Because sometimes intentions really are enough.
You know, after I got acclimated to school, and the school got acclimated to me, I had a great time. Sure there were challenges. The swirlies. The wet willies in my oversized ears. The nights spent huddled in my locker against my will. But I have found a way to channel those times of trial into something positive: our national agenda of apology for enhanced interrogation techniques against innocent terrorists.

And so I say to each of you who’s found yourself on the wrong end of a urinal cake, take heart. At some point down the road, you will find an opportunity to get back at every single one of those individuals who harmed you. It’s a great feeling.

Now let me speak to those students who perhaps aren’t going to achieve. Let me be clear with you: I know how you feel. You may not know this, but I wasn’t the greatest student in the world. I went to a nondescript college in California before transferring to Columbia in New York and then, using my multi-racial status and designation as a Muslim, which I no longer need to use, I was able to get into Harvard. But this is America, and the beauty of America is that no one can release any documents about you unless you want them released; so if you're a mediocre student, never fear. No one will know. Unless you’re involved in defending America or involved in a national security project, in which case, all bets are off.

And while none of you can be me. Ever. You can be like me.

My message, though, is this: don’t fear mediocrity. It can empower you, just as it empowered me. No one will know. And if you get the right ghostwriter, and make the right friends, and use the right technology tools to speak with a basso profundo and slight southern twang, you can seem a lot smarter than you really are. Again, embrace this. Make it work for you.

Now, I did learn a few tricks as a hall monitor, let me share them with you before I get to the real point of this speech ... health care reform and what we're doing to make American safe again from her citizens …


  1. Hilarious. Now, that's an interesting speech.

  2. Love the parody...only trouble is that no matter what Big Guy says, if you read between the lines, the message will be exactly what Totus reveals in this original speech (every speech on every topic that he has given so far is ALL ABOUT HIM...even with his usual disclaimer, "This isn't about me.")

    Speaking of Big Guy's college cred - I want to know how the press got hold of the Master's Thesis written twenty years ago by the Virginian Republican candidate for governor, McDonnell,...and so far all of Big Guy's college records that have been released could be fit into the space between the arrows here ----><----

  3. TOTUS let the indoctrination begin. You could throw in a few catch phrases like the Wrong Jerimiah Wright saying: Young America, your "chickens have come home to roost" so to speak.

    If you do not heed my advice God, if you believe in one will "damn America!"

    Let me be clear. A clean brown shirt of service beats a dirty white shirt of selfishness.

    So as a great leader and orator like myself in his well read book "My Struggle", the title is translated by the way, I digress. Anyway as that great orator said "Its springtime for me and Germany, winter for Poland and France" or something like that.

    When you have great friends with good ideas like Van Jones and Rahm Immanuel you can't go wrong.

    The late Michael Jackson once said speaking of children that a "good bedtime story beats a bad nosejob."

    I find this true of Lady M, who was supposed to be with me this morning, but had a special briefing with "Sacs Fifth Avenue" that she could not miss.

    Now back to health care (pause, cough up some phlegm, spit out, get drink of water, resume speech).....

  4. TOTUS, Dear - thank you. The picture paints a thousand words, all summed up by "mediocre".

  5. TOTUS! Take a break, it has been a busy day!

  6. Wow, this is awesome. The best part is it's shorter than ANYTHING Obama has ever said!

  7. I'd actually listen to that speech!

  8. I would make my kids listen to that.

  9. I would NEEDLEPOINT it
    ----since BO rarely says the truth.

    Move over, TWW:
    David writes imaginatively, too!

    (BO, you narcissist: SMACK-DOWN!)

  10. Hey - I didn't know about this NEWER post! TOTUS, you little stinker! oh, pooh. Here I have been posting to myself on the earlier Tuesday post all day..... LOL I wondered where everybody was.

    What did you guys think of Obama's quaint little story about his mom getting him up at 4:30 a.m. every morning to get "American" teaching? Such a fake story. How old was he in Indonesia? Five? Six? I guess its to gloss over the teaching of Islam he got while there.

    BTW - I read about what Opus#6 told us about in an earlier post (the "possible violation of US Code") in an online news article, so its out there for all to see.

    Just now checking my email, I saw this information from AmeriPAC -

    === Obama was an active member of the Chicago Democratic Socialist Party. Web Bloggers Unearthed the Evidence Buried Deep by a Liberal Media that Calls Obama God.

    Socialist "New Party" Connections to Obama included in this document:
    Obama member of the Socialist Party
    Obama contract with the Socialist Party
    Obama support of and by the Socialist Party
    Obama Socialist Party connection to ACORN
    Obama Connection to ACORN
    Obama Connection to Castro
    William Ayers Connection to the Socialist Party
    William Ayers Connection to Castro

    President Barack Obama was a member of the socialist New Party during the 1990s, according to new evidence unearthed by web bloggers. Obama received the Socialist party's endorsement for his state Senate run in 1996.

    Everything is documented at websites within the Chicago Democratic Socialist Party archives.

    The Democratic Socialist Party of America published in their July/August Edition of New Ground 47 Newsletter.

    "The Chicago New Party is increasingly becoming a viable political organization ..."

    The New Party has continued to solidify this base ..."

    "winning electoral primaries. All four candidates attended the NEW PARTY membership meeting on April 11th 1996 to express their gratitude. Barack Obama, victor in the 13th State Senate District, encouraged NPers to join in his task forces on Voter Education and Voter Registration." ===

    This comes as no surprise. If AmeriPAC sends me a link to the actual document to which they refer, I'll post it. Until then, I guess we really can't be sure of its veracity.

    Here is a link to their website for other information:


  11. Now that's a transparent speech!

    I hear now that Bush 41 gave a similar speech. My school must have decided not to show it. They probably thought it wasn't worth pulling the students out of class for an assembly in the gym. That's the only way we all could have seen it, since the classrooms didn't have TVs.

  12. Not only did Bush 41 give a speech, the next day the Democrats in Congress demanded an investigation and held hearings on it.

    What a double-standard.

  13. My daugher forgot about the speech and sent my favorite rascal (age 12) to school. He came here after the bus looking for "fude", as usual.

    He says,(while shaking down the fridge) "Gramma, did you hear that dumb speech the president made?"

    I said, "Yup".

    He says, "That guy's retarded. He said that stupid story about living in Indonesia, and then he said the same thing over and over, all about the chances he got, like he was stupid or something. How come he needed so many chances? And why'd he say the same story over and over?"

    I (biting tongue, but not very hard) said, "Maybe so you'll think about him?"

    He yells, "Think about him!" and laughs, "we were laughing at him. He's really, really retarded, Gramma! Can I have this rootbeer?"

    I love kidz.

  14. Great post, David. Yeah, Peach Obama REMINDS ME OF HITLER, too. :D

    "... Hitler, aided by... many a strange intellectual, succeeded in inculcating [in his followers] a lust for power and ... a contempt for democracy and individual freedom ... ." The Rise and Fall of the 3rd Reich by William Shirer at 138.

    "A home [Hitler] began to read the Social Democratic press, study its speeches, study its organization, reflect on its psychology and political techniques ... he came to three conclusions which explained to him the success of the Social Democrats: They knew how to create a mass movement ..., the art of propaganda among the masses; and ... the value of using what he calls 'spiritual and physical terror.' [remember the early 2009 terrifying flyby of Air Force One at 1,500 feet over lower Manhattan?]

    The third ... intrigued the young Hitler. Within ten years he would put it to good use ... '... spiritual terror ... unleashes a veritable barrage of lies and slanders against whatever adversary seems most dangerous, until the nerves of the attacked persons break down ... physical terror toward the individual and the masses ... in the ranks of ... supporters the victory achieved seems a triumph of justice ... the defeated adversary ... despairs of the success of any further resistance.' (Mein Kampf pp. 43-44) Ibid. at 43.

    ONE WOULD HAVE TO BE BLIND not to see the many, [one could write a book...] grotesque, similarities. One difference though, Dope is bone headedly stupid. This will work to our advantage, at least to some degree.

    Hi, Jamie! So glad you joined us. ;)

  15. I'm frustrated. TOTUS posted THREE times today. There is yet another, newer post than this one. What has gotten into TOTUS? (I'm not complaining, I like it.)

    TWW - the more I see the similarities to Hitler, the more it makes me nervous.

    LOVED YOUR POST, bettyanne, about what your grandson said about the messiah. Make me smile. Gives me hope.

    God Bless the Children.

  16. Jamie:
    Don't be frustrated. TOTUS had a lot to say. After all, TMN got his mouth running and TOTUS just can't shut up. The poor dear is probably exhausted and downing gulps of energizing ions and neutrons just to keep up.

    About the kid: I didn't write the part about his complaints of missing gym. It must have been the absolute worst, because he talked as if it were tantamount to a crime. If the Messiah meant to impress, he did just the opposite on my grandson, who thinks he is an intrusive and boring retard. But then, Levi is a just white kid, and doesn't really count.

  17. Levi sure sounds a normal kid. But, you are right in that Levi doesn't count since he is just a white kid.

    I had forgotten about how older kids usually tune out when adults try to give them pep talks. Heck, half those kids in today's audience were probably texting during the speech. I'll bet there was some eye-rolling going on there.

    You notice, BO chose to stage his speech using
    "a diverse group of kids, Asian, Hispanic, white, blah, blah, blah...." (as heard on Fox News, as was told to them by an Obama aide).

    Children from a Virginia suburb, most likely kids of D.C. workers. Children who have a bright future ahead of them. Children who probably do NOT dream of making it as a "rapper" or a "sports star", or drop out of school.

    Obama's speech was geared more toward children who live in the inner city. Yet he chose to be shown preaching to kids of middle to upper class parents. Talk about "staging". This was staged.

    Poor people should be insulted by that. But, of course, they won't be.

    But, maybe BO was talking to those white, suburban kids with dreams of Columbine that his pal, Van Jones, was spouting off about on that video. You know, the ones who "don't have a masculine shoulder to lean on and get comfort from".... so they turn to mass murder. Isn't it terrible how white men aren't masculine enough for their sons? Black men make such good role models, don't they? After all, as Jones said "black kids might shoot another black kid", but those evil white suburban kids who lack a masculine role model are the ones who "always do the Columbines" .....

  18. Betty Ann, thank you for sharing your super-cool Levi. He's obviously inherited a lot of your intelligence and clear-eyed common sense -- and great sense of humor.

    As Jamie said, hearing that genuinely disgusted (almost)teen-aged response was refreshing.


    "Dude! SHUT-UP already. You're making us miss gym!!"

  19. [TOTUS]"intent to achieve" -- LOL -- what the road to Hell is paved with.

  20. I just discovered something. If you substitute "Hitler" everywhere Dope uses "me" and "drugs" wherever he says "school" or "education,"...... you get the hidden meaning. Mmm, hm. ;)

    [EXCERPTS revealing the hidden meaning]

    Today I am going to speak to you about Hitler. Well, not entirely about Hitler; I will speak to you about you, too, but mostly I’m going to talk about Hitler and how you can be like Hitler. Because I have had a great deal of experience in drugs. In drugs. ***

    You know, after I got acclimated to drugs, and the drugs got acclimated to Hitler, I had a great time. ***

    Now let Hitler speak to those students who perhaps aren’t going to achieve. Let Hitler be clear with you: ***

    And while none of you can be Hitler. Ever. You can be like Hitler. ***

    '''---''' '''---''' '''---''' '''---''' '''---'''

    BBC Announcer: In the news today, November 6, 1933, Hitler made yet another speech declaring emphatically,

    "When an opponent declares, 'I will not come over to your side,' ... I will calmly say, 'Your child belongs to us already.'"

    [Rise and Fall of the 3rd Reich by William Shirer at 343]

    [AND MORE....]

    "Text books were hastily rewritten, curricula were changed, Mein Kampf was made ... 'our infallible pedagogical guiding star.'" [Ibid. 344]

    "... the Jungvolk ... took the following oath: 'In the presence of this blood banner, which represents our Fuehrer, I swear to devote all my energies and my strength to the savior of our country, Adolf Hitler. I am willing and ready to give up my life for him, so help me God.'" [Ibid. at 350]

  21. Well, he does not say "dude". We don't have twitter or cells or texting up here in the mountains. He has an ipod, but it is programmed with Sinatra, Mozart, and lots of good blues. He reads a chapter of Proverbs everyday of the month (there are 31 chapters, one for every day). He wants to be a pilot when he grows up. He is struggling through Don Quixote de la Mancha, because we asked him to, but only when we are looking. When we are not looking, he is reading an adventure.

    The stoopid thing about Obama's desire to address the next generation of voters in order to implant his ideology, is that we all know he is completely out of touch. However, HE does not know that. He thinks, and his entourage think and also cause him to believe, that he is our favorite rock star, our hope and dream, our Messiah. When the truth is he is beginning to stink. "Fish and visitors stink after three days," - B. Franklin.

    What is so awful about his address to kids is not that the president wants to address American kids. But that he gave this speech exhorting conservative values, which he personaly abhores. This man never worked for one goddamn thing in his shallow lfe. He's a leech, for crying out loud. Now, here he is the Grand Liar, evoking self-suffciancy and pride in achievment. If the kids take his advice, they will be tea party members forthwith!

    We used to get patches in gym, and aspire to the olympics. At the olympics, we strived to achieve atheletic superiority for our country, and exhibit superior sportsmanship. The president gave out patches and medals for achievement. Where are those times?

    Now, he wants you to devote your desired skill to advancing the country's agenda. What's the country's agenda? To support the government. What's the governmetn's agenda? To control and use the people, like a gleeful parasite which has infested a healthy and promising host.

    But some of us didn't raise robots!

    Beware, you liberals. "He who rolls a stone, it will roll back on him."

  22. (applause! applause!)

    Betty Ann, print that out, call up the Rush Limbaugh show (have something to do while you wait for 2 hours on hold %$), and READ THAT OVER THE AIR. That was excellent.

    "*** To control and use the people, like a gleeful parasite which has infested a healthy and promising host."

    Yeah, those Presidential Physical Fitness Awards seem to have been trampled under the fat little feet of the "robots" who do not believe in rewarding extraordinary talent or effort. Pathetic.

    Glad to hear Levi is such a delight. That's one cool kid. What a treasure. You are a rich woman.

  23. [Betty Ann's Levi] "... he said the same thing over and over, all about the chances he got, like he was stupid or something. How come he needed so many chances?"

    LOL. Great insight, Levi. My guess is.... because he kept messing up!


    How many "do-overs" is the "average Joe" going to give this guy?

    - 57 states -- "D'oh! Do over...."
    - like (chortle) Special Olympics -- "D'oh! Do over...."
    - bow to Saud -- "D'oh! Do over...."
    - my parents met at Selma -- "D'oh! Do over...."
    - met my wife at college -- "D'oh! Do over...."
    - don't know ... Austrian -- "D'oh! Do over...."
    - gallows humor -- "D'oh! Do over...."
    - punch drunk -- "D'oh! Do over...."
    - stupidly -- "D'oh! Do over...."[er, recalibrate]
    - pig in lipstick -- "D'oh! Do over...."
    - speech #1 for gov't takeover of medical system -- "D'oh! Do over...."
    - speech #2 for gov't takeover of medical system -- "D'oh! Do over...."
    - speech #111 for gov't takeover of medical system -- "D'oh! Do over...."

    United States of America, "D'oh! Do [election] over...."

  24. I don't care who you are that's FUNNY! ROTFLM*O

  25. The furor over the Presidents attempts to indoctrinate students with socialists propaganda boiled over today immediately after the President's speech was aired.
    In Sacramento , conservatives , outraged by the speech, set fire to a Public Light Rail railcar yelling "Down with public transportation!"
    In Ft. Wayne, Indiana, young people teepeed a public park. "Socialism is wrong", said one young person as he smashed a drinking fountain with a hammer.
    In Dallas, Texas, angry patrons burnt piles of books at the public library and spray painted the words "public libraries are socialists" on walls.
    Police and firefighters In Boise, Idaho, were pelted with eggs by enraged mobs. "Those public servants are putting private guards and "for profit" firemen out of business." cried one angry participant.
    And at Cape Canaveral Florida, unhappy residents picketed a NASA office with signs reading:
    "Get government out of Space" and "Bring our flag back from the moon"

  26. Sounds like you've been to a few protests by Acorn and SEIU union organizers. Or maybe, domestic terrorists, like ELF.

    Hamster? Isn't that just a little rat?

    I prefer Guinea Pigs.

    You know, what the Dems call patients in the Obama Health Care System.

    And, as usual, the libs missed the whole point about the Obama indoctrination. The uproar caused him to ditch the original speech (that went with the "lesson plan" that was provided) and he switched to the benign one. But he managed to indoctrinate a select group of kids BEFORE he gave the speech to the rest of them.

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