Saturday, March 28, 2009

London Calling

Rahm, Gibbsy and I aren't up here at Camp David simply for the great buckwheat waffles and the free POTUS snugglies they hand out like tissue paper for guests.

We're all heading over to London on April 1st for the G20 meeting, and Big Guy has to be ready, as this will be the first international event where he sits down substantively with his fellow world leaders. This is a really important trip for one reason: so far, we've kind of screwed the pooch on this international-relations thing.

So we've been doing lots of rehearsing. In London I'll be close by the whole time, so Big Guy can introduce himself to his fellow leaders in their native language. That was Gibbsy's idea, and it's not like this "Wow them with linguistic charm" strategy can't work, but I fear our focus on this kind of stuff has really taken Big Boy off his game. Some of these phonetic intros are really tough, and three hours into this, and we haven't moved past our first leader-greeting. And it's Gordon Brown.

16 comments:

  1. Don't get any chiggars alking in the woods up ther TOTUS.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Cut Big Guy some slack...that British language is tough!

    ReplyDelete
  3. TOTUS, you have a gift from the great computer in the sky as Rush would say. Have you thought about taking a gig in Hollywood. The pay is great with huge bonuses.

    Does Leno need a prompter? I've seen him use cue cards, but you would be a step up. Think about it.

    BTW, did you hear what the greens are asking us to do tonight besides turning off the lights? We're all suppose to cut down on carbon by holding our breath for an hour. I'm boycotting that one.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Maybe they can bring Gordon Brown a replacement set of DVDs formatted for the UK so he can play them - some microwave popcorn would be a nice touch as well.

    ReplyDelete
  5. TOTUS, I figure if you're good enough for the Big O, you're good enough for me, so this is where I get all my news. You're telling me the G20 meet April 1st? Seriously? Is it wise to make it that obvious? Or is this one of those 11-dimensional chess things where embracing your inner fool means you're not a fool unless you don't realize that you really are a fool in which case it's even more important to embrace the fool who --

    Oh, hell. Toes is having my car towed.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Hey TOTUS, bring a few of those POTUS snuggies with you for Gordon Brown. They will make the perfect gift to replace the DVDs. They don't suffer from those international technical issues and after the smack down from Daniel Hannan, Gordon could use a little TLC.

    ReplyDelete
  7. TOTUS,

    We know how the Big Guy likes to crack a joke from time to time, don't let the Monty Python bits get too out of control when chumming it up with Gordy...

    ReplyDelete
  8. Hey Totus, On the up side, I popped on over to the at&t/yahoo homepage--and there you were again! You are getting quite a bit of face time online and that can only be good for your career.

    You looked quite handsome by the way. I loved the shade of blue you were sporting.

    ReplyDelete
  9. TOTUS, I hope they don't forget to bring your international power adapter, I'd hate to see you get accidentally blown up by being plugged into a 50hz 230V outlet!

    ReplyDelete
  10. TOTUS, Jerry is really right about the power thing! Anyway it is impressive how Obama has really got the whole world loving us now that Bush is out!

    John's Space

    ReplyDelete
  11. Another "Bizarro World" case where "W" was a dumb cowboy who sucked at diplomatic relations, so supposedly we were not respected. Obama on the other hand is the Great Orator & Friend Maker, and will give us our respect back.

    Not.


    http://theconservativegardener.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  12. TOTUS; I sure hope the Big One gets to witness first hand the riots that are planned during his visit. It will give him a preview of what is going to happen here, when the Sheep wake-up and know "who" they elected. :-)

    ReplyDelete
  13. TO GORDON BROWN: "Nice pants, Gordy. Hand me a napkin, would you?"

    TO ANGELA MERKEL: "Ich bin ein Hamburger, fraulein. Du bist ein damen uber alles."

    TO SARKOZY (but really to CHIRAC, wink-wink):

    "Merci pour la tres bon menage. (shrug) Pardon, je ne parle pas lingua franca. Souffle?"

    TO H. R. H. Elizabeth II: [high five her, well, attempt to anyway] "Yo, mama, me 'bama. (lecherous leer) How about a private audience? I'm free at 8."

    Aw, why bother. B. Hussein, a.k.a., "gaffe-o-matic," will come up with something far better than anything we ever could.

    Just whisper in his ear before he meets each dignitary, "This one oppresses blacks, too."

    ReplyDelete
  14. Please do not let Hillary's translation team assist on this trip, we know they must have had a very low GPA! LOL VN8

    ReplyDelete
  15. Good advice, VN8. B.O., J.B., and Rotten have a combined college G.P.A. of 3.

    "OVERCHARGED"

    ReplyDelete
  16. Thanks for the heads up, Janny. It is now 8:30 PM PST. I just got back from turning ON ALL OUR FLOODLIGHTS AND JUST ABOUT EVERY LIGHT IN THE HOUSE. At 9:30, I'll turn them off.

    Amazingly appropriate that those of us who walk by the light of Truth are NOT the ones in the dark tonight.

    ReplyDelete