Big Guy and I are flying out to Tempe, Arizona, where we are going to give the commencement address at Arizona State University. Initially we agreed to do this as a favor to Bruno, who used to be governor out there. But we've quickly learned that doing favors for him never quite work out (making him DHS Secretary being Exhibit A). Now, both Big Guy and I are kind of annoyed at having to do this, and here's why:
On Sunday, he and I will be down in South Bend, Ind., where Notre Dame will be giving us an honorary degree in return for Big Guy imparting his wisdom to the Golden Domed masses. We figure these degrees might be able to help us get a real job when Big Guy retires from the Presidency thirteen or fourtenn years from now. Kind of a backup plan, if you will, because we'll still have eight or nine years of real income-earning power.
But what do we get for flying out twice as far to Tempe where the temperature will be in the 90s (and don't give me that thing about a "dry heat)? Bupkis. I mean, good grief, ASU gave an honorary degree to Barry Goldwater ... and he lost a Presidential election.
Frankly, I was of the mind to stay home for this one, so that the ASU Sun Devil grads wouldn't be able to enjoy the full "Big Guy Experience" as we like to call his prepared remarks transmitted from my screens through his mouth. But we won't be petty. We'll leave that to Rahm. And we all know how that will work out.