Thursday, March 26, 2009

Ratings Review

Big O called us into a strategy meeting a while ago in the Oval to talk about the declining ratings of our TV show.

Gibbsy blamed it on people's Tivos, and that 40 million viewers was nothing to sneeze at. "But I was on every channel anybody watches, so the number should have been higher," Big O insisted.
But Rahm blamed the press corps, that they weren't good-looking enough to drive eyeballs to the show. "All the hot ones are up on Capitol Hill ... or at Fox," he said.

I have my own suspicions of why the ratings are cratering on us, but couldn't share them with Gibbsy in the room. But I did suggest that perhaps the Big Guy needs to spice things up a bit for the audience. For example, on yesterday's townhall, Big Guy talked about his nurse fetish for a good five minutes, and suddenly the web traffic tripled, and with a whole new demographic, too. Of course, most of the IP addresses were from prisons, and those guys can't vote. But they still care about health care.

13 comments:

  1. Great idea!

    People love to hear about people's dirty laundry and gossip. You could talk about all the stuff Hillary does that is illegal. That could take days, though.

    You could talk about all the stuff “Dead Fish” has done. You could talk about Timmah has his tax tips.

    Boy, you have a lot of dirt to talk about. Oh…you could mention some of the O-man’s too.

    http://franklinslocke.blogspot.com/

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  2. Heh- AND you got replaced by a TV... waiting for THOSE comments...

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  4. why you gotz to be pallin' around with WalMart 'lektroniks?
    can't you slap a flagpin on that and make it all purty like?

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  5. I have to ask, Are you single? My toaster has been looking pretty lonely for awhile now. Aluminum body, sleek lines, 4 slots. I'll send pics if interested.

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  6. TOTUS, just cancel the show. Get one of your CPU buddies to display "ILLEGAL OPERATION. FATAL ERROR" no matter what Wonder Child tries to do.

    You'd be doing everyone a favor. It's a waste of time. Those with their brain set to "ON" will never watch "Empty Suit Hour" and those with their brain set to "OFF" wouldn't abandon "O" to save their soul (literally).

    If they've already paid for the time, just run old newsreels of Hitler's speeches; the Obamaniacs (the only ones who will be watching) won't notice the difference.

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  7. "Doc, The new Obama toaster blew up in my face".

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  8. Zombie Hero, is our children learning?

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  9. Could you please refrain from using "Big O" to describe Obama? There is only one Big O. You are offending my all-time basketball hero, Oscar Robertson. :)

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  10. Out here in chattering class land we call him lovingly "The Barrista"

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  11. I agree with robert verdi-over exposure-did you see those ab pix?

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