Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Our Smart Friends in The Media

There has been a lot of talk in the White House today about these Tax Day Tea Parties around the country. They apparently started when a CNBC reporter called for taxpayers to revolt against Big Guy’s economic stimulus package, which gave every American a tax cut in every paycheck. My tax cut is about 13 cents every two weeks. Some of our staffers in the media are pretty upset about this perceived attack on the Big O; here is just a sampling of text messaging mong some of our unpaid volunteer aides, whose names are changed to protect their privacy:

David Schuster: What’s up with all these right wing nuts doing the tea party thing? Did our leader do something with tea?
Keith Olbermann: I’m looking at a picture of President Barack Hussein Obama right now, my gawd, he is magnificent.
Schuster: I agree wholeheartedly, but what about the tea?
Olbermann: Oh, that guy Santelli on the other NBC cable channel started this, he’s a fascist.
Schuster: I hate that guy. But I don’t understand what tea has to do with taxes.
Olbermann: When I was Cornell, the Ivy League school I graduated from, I learned that it had something to do with the British crown refusing to give away tea, or charging Americans for tea or something like that back in the 1700s. It was a big deal back then. All these right wing zealots live in the past.
Schuster: Did you see the memo from Rahm telling us we should do jokes about tea-bagging on TV today, as long as we weren't perceived to be belitting one of the gay communities' cherished cultural touchstones?
John Stewart: Did someone mention tea-bagging? My teleprompter has a good joke about that for tonight's show. I think.
Olbermann: Great, now we have a threesome, which reminds me guys, remember that weekend in Turkey when we ...


  1. TOTUS,
    As a COTUS, I just wanted to thank you for being a light in the deep dark night...

  2. Totus, are you serious about your tax cut being 13 cents? I don't receive pay check so I was really curious to know what everyone was seeing on their pay check...

  3. TOTUS,
    I kind of miss your counter thing - number of visitors, countries, etc. But I guess it's gone.
    Lacking that, how about a counter showing days remaining until your well-deserved retirement? I had one going until my retirement, until the economy got gut-shot. I guess tipping over while behind the counter of a fast food place is now a stretch goal.

  4. PLEASE!!
    No matter how much you may discover, don't tell us about Olberman and 3 guys (or 2 including him, totals hardly matter) and that time in Turkey. The bad Napolitano may be profiling...knowledge is complicity.

  5. I passed out flyers in my neighborhood announcing a Tea Party at 4 PM. Unfortunately I could not afford any more words like 'protest', and all that showed up were 50 English kids on student visas continually asking me where the 'breadstuffs' were. Damn you to hell Staples.

  6. TOTUS:
    What a relief, I thought the media had no training whatever in U.S. History, nor the events that brought us from 1776 to...well, let's not call it socialism for heaven's sake! It's only been three months. But think what a mess we'd be in without the media there, always concerned and caring, guiding us though the deep, dark nights. And days. Even unto the seventh generation.

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