Monday, April 20, 2009

Shhh. Can You Keep a Secret?

So Big Guy and I went out to Langley to talk to the troops at CIA headquarters.  This was a big to-do, especially since many of the senior field operatives from around the world flew in on the government's dime to hear Big O speak.  He only made two stumbling errors, but that had more to do with my operator's cold hands than anything else. 
Big Guy's message to the attendees was stay the course, and he apologized for our administration's leaking of the "intense interrogation" memos. He blamed it on the court case, but that doesn't explain how the nonredacted versions ended up in the hands of all those bloggers we worked with during the campaign. Oh, well, that kind of stuff happens, I guess. 

The bigger surprise for me, was that Big Guy put a hobbit in charge of the CIA.  I mean, geez, look at how short Panetta is, and he's a good eight feet back from Big Guy in that picture. I guess it's fitting that Panetta is there at Langley; after all, hobbits are supposedely imaginary and so are threats of "man-caused disasters."


  1. Totus my daughter was watching the the big guy talk to the CIA folks on the news tonight, and she was disturbed about the fact that big guy still isn't able to get a sentence out without stumbling. I told her you were probably just bored and playing tricks again.

    Be careful doing stuff like that at the CIA; there were a lot of very enthusiastic, hand-clappers in that audience (which I totally didn't get after he just sold them out.) They are hard pressed to create new "interrogation" techniques now, and I'd hate to see them try a few out on you.

  2. TOTUS: any truth to the rumour that the hobbit picked yout entry, ”let’s scroll” contest to pick the new, non-threatening mission interjection?

  3. Hey TOTUS, Big-O has a new BFF and I even heard he is trying to "Quit You." Like that will ever happen. Funny Stuff-and I bet you'll even get a laugh or two. Check him out at: ObamasBlackberry.blogspot

  4. I was concerned to find out that by being conservative and a religious leader that I am targeted by Homeland security, but his new speech has reassured me. What is the worst they can do to me now? Will the "Spanish Inquisition" bring out the "comfy chair" to make me recant?

  5. You look pretty good in that shot TOTUS.

  6. Chuck you are so right about TOTUS! He really in the picture. No POTUS without TOTUS.

    John's Space

  7. TOTUS!

    Just saw a really great picture of you, and done by a Pulitzer Prize winner, no less!

    See Investor's Business Daily's Political cartoon of March 12th, by Michael Ramirez. I am so proud of you, but I hope you won't forget your real friends, now that you are hitting the big time.

    You looked amazing, as always, so tall and strong.

  8. TOTUS, I can understand the one continuing his apology tour and speaking at the CIA...(after all, aren't we all afraid of spiders? If that's not torture, I don't know what is.) But those words and stars chiseled into granite in the background saying something about honor were just too distracting. It blocks my view Obama and more importantly - you! Was the person who covered up the "IHS" at Georgetown on a different assignment today? Who dropped the ball? I did see you in the photograph though, and you look marvelous! At least the people who put drapes over that offending title IHS at Georgetown have their priorities in order. Those CIA-types gave their lives that we in America might live (but were overseen by Our Dear Leader). After all, he single handedly made those pesky pirates cower. That Georgetown culprit's goal was to save the entire human family -- with no credit going to the one!

  9. TOTUS, this is serious. We know that you do your utmost to make Big Guy look good. But face it, you've tried the teleprompter straight reading dead ahead, and it looks, well, robotic. Then you went for the "wing screens".
    To me, it comes off like he is watching an intense ping-pong tournament, and he seems to favor this style of late. I am sick of it, what with the thumb and forefinger jabbing in the air, here and there,to create the illusion of profound intensity of conviction. Well, it doesn't wash and it has become quite tiresome and used for way too much as a prop.
    My suggestion is the Cinerama type of thing. A screen that sweeps in an arc shape; a flow with continuity. Another plus is the fact that
    when he goes back and forth, he often times loses track, and then. well, he has to INPROVISE
    with his own words. Will not do.

  10. You know what they say "It's better to ask for forgivness than permission". How can the CIA give Big Guy such a warm and fuzzy ovation when he just stabbed them in the back. Does everyones bung hole seem a little sore lately from all the bending over we've been doing? We should spend our "little extra" that's in our paychecks lately on a tube of KY (that should be enough to cover it). But all is good, we'll get an appology soon enough.

  11. "... that kind of stuff happens... ."

    THEREFORE, D'oh! is a DOPE, HOPElessly incompetent,


    B. Hussein is "the enemy within," deliberately, with malice aforethought, destroying the United States of America.

    In either case, HOW CAN THE CIA APPLAUD HIM!!!

    The answer is: one who talks, walks, bows, and grins like a dope is a dope.

    But, he’s a dope with ambitions. Ambitions that would never be realized BUT FOR the putrid wind beneath his bat-like wings, the foul breath of clever Marxist/fascist fiends. Just like when B.O. was “president” of law review. He was only a mascot, serving both his own ego and the egos of those who elected him.

  12. Oh, TOTUS! You are SO handsome, free and tall!

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